For some reason I had a notion that when you had a baby, you had to settle down and buy a house and live in the suburb. And suburbs and small towns are probably the only places that respect families and people that want families.
It's been a relief--and an empowering realization--to discover that big cities love babies too.
True story! This city is in LOVE with my baby.
Tuesday night as we strolled through the park, a man stopped Jason to say, "That's an awful lot of cute you're holding there." On the subway, one woman felt the need to get Greta's attention to tell her a sweet goodbye. When we got off, a new friend gave her a cheery "Goodbye, chiquita!"
And this was just one evening--and doesn't include yesterday's museum curator telling Greta "You're the best visitor we've had all year!" or how our cook at the dining room always pulls out some soft steamed vegetables or french fries for free for us to give the baby.
Our first weekend we were shocked. Delightfully surprised at the smiles and stops and points and double-takes our family got. I mean, we were coming straight from Provo, where our baby was complimented and smiled at plenty. But it was nothing compared to here.
She's literally stopped a group of tourists who saw her in the park and blocked the sidewalk pointing and taking pictures. She draws out conversations on the subways that are otherwise silent. She gets told (and we get told) "God bless you" most days of the week.
And not only do people like the baby, but there also seems to be a real respect for motherhood and families. I feel like people really look out for us.
When people see me alone in the subway hefting my stroller and small child up flights of stairs, they go out of their way to help, even if it means turning around or missing their train. I can't tell you how often people try to help me. People open doors or hold doors for us. People call out in the crowded trains "Watch out for the baby!" And there are the people that play peek a boo or make animal noises--or even the stoic teenage boys that suddenly cave when trying to entertain a baby.
Don't get me wrong. It's not all rosy. I begrudge the many many stairs in this city and that there are not elevators and ramps anywhere. It would also be nice to have a yard and not have to go through many hallways, elevators, and security desks to get outside. I heard a mom in our ward the other day bemoan that her child doesn't have more space to crawl, and wishing to own something instead of always renting apartments. When you have a baby, you also get some weirdies that stop us with plenty of advice. Or people that are not in their right/sober state that are trying to touch the baby and we have to intervene.
But I feel confident here. After the first few shaky days when I wondered how on earth I would get around this city alone, I've learned that I am more than capable, and that this city is much more baby-friendly than I knew.
Once I started looking for it, I saw that there are babies and kids everywhere. Newborns in wraps, and babies in strollers, and toddlers confidently walking these sidewalks. There are families here. They are playing in the park. They are also wrestling their children on the subway trying to give them snacks and read them stories and keep them entertained and quiet. There are moms that band together and get together often. There are friendly kids in the park who sing your baby "Happy Birthday." And these are all people that still have great families and only have an apartment and who may or may not even have a car.
As we're frantically and urgently trying to figure out whether or not we will be trying to stay in a month when this internship ends, it's been nice to find some comfort in this. Sure, some places are more conducive to families than others. But as we face a lot of uncertainty for the next few years, it's been nice to see families make it work in a lot of situations.
As it turns out, you can take your babies to the city. Or the suburb. Or the farm or the mountains or abroad or grandma's basement or wherever else you need to. And you can be confident and capable and find community and give your baby a wonderful childhood.
A stranger on the boardwalk randomly asked if we wanted a picture of the three of us the other night. She then was a little baffled at my camera, and took just one shot--and I kind of love it.
It's been a relief--and an empowering realization--to discover that big cities love babies too.
True story! This city is in LOVE with my baby.
Tuesday night as we strolled through the park, a man stopped Jason to say, "That's an awful lot of cute you're holding there." On the subway, one woman felt the need to get Greta's attention to tell her a sweet goodbye. When we got off, a new friend gave her a cheery "Goodbye, chiquita!"
And this was just one evening--and doesn't include yesterday's museum curator telling Greta "You're the best visitor we've had all year!" or how our cook at the dining room always pulls out some soft steamed vegetables or french fries for free for us to give the baby.
Our first weekend we were shocked. Delightfully surprised at the smiles and stops and points and double-takes our family got. I mean, we were coming straight from Provo, where our baby was complimented and smiled at plenty. But it was nothing compared to here.
She's literally stopped a group of tourists who saw her in the park and blocked the sidewalk pointing and taking pictures. She draws out conversations on the subways that are otherwise silent. She gets told (and we get told) "God bless you" most days of the week.
And not only do people like the baby, but there also seems to be a real respect for motherhood and families. I feel like people really look out for us.
When people see me alone in the subway hefting my stroller and small child up flights of stairs, they go out of their way to help, even if it means turning around or missing their train. I can't tell you how often people try to help me. People open doors or hold doors for us. People call out in the crowded trains "Watch out for the baby!" And there are the people that play peek a boo or make animal noises--or even the stoic teenage boys that suddenly cave when trying to entertain a baby.
Don't get me wrong. It's not all rosy. I begrudge the many many stairs in this city and that there are not elevators and ramps anywhere. It would also be nice to have a yard and not have to go through many hallways, elevators, and security desks to get outside. I heard a mom in our ward the other day bemoan that her child doesn't have more space to crawl, and wishing to own something instead of always renting apartments. When you have a baby, you also get some weirdies that stop us with plenty of advice. Or people that are not in their right/sober state that are trying to touch the baby and we have to intervene.
But I feel confident here. After the first few shaky days when I wondered how on earth I would get around this city alone, I've learned that I am more than capable, and that this city is much more baby-friendly than I knew.
Once I started looking for it, I saw that there are babies and kids everywhere. Newborns in wraps, and babies in strollers, and toddlers confidently walking these sidewalks. There are families here. They are playing in the park. They are also wrestling their children on the subway trying to give them snacks and read them stories and keep them entertained and quiet. There are moms that band together and get together often. There are friendly kids in the park who sing your baby "Happy Birthday." And these are all people that still have great families and only have an apartment and who may or may not even have a car.
As we're frantically and urgently trying to figure out whether or not we will be trying to stay in a month when this internship ends, it's been nice to find some comfort in this. Sure, some places are more conducive to families than others. But as we face a lot of uncertainty for the next few years, it's been nice to see families make it work in a lot of situations.
As it turns out, you can take your babies to the city. Or the suburb. Or the farm or the mountains or abroad or grandma's basement or wherever else you need to. And you can be confident and capable and find community and give your baby a wonderful childhood.
A stranger on the boardwalk randomly asked if we wanted a picture of the three of us the other night. She then was a little baffled at my camera, and took just one shot--and I kind of love it.
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ReplyDeleteOh, you all look so great and happy in that picture! New York is good for you guys.
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